Anonymous Question Submission....Yay it’s about Oral Sex!!

If it takes a man (28 y/o) takes forever to orgasm off head, is it more about him or does it mean he is not into the person performing it?


There are a few possibilities for him taking a hot second to experience an orgasm. The more common ones I’ve come across over the years are:

  1. Our bodies don’t react exactly or when we want them to -- so maybe he really IS feeling the performer, but his body want to be on it’s own schedule. 
  2. Some type of mental, physical and/or emotional block isn’t allowing him to be present Some type of mental, physical and/or emotional block isn’t allowing him to be present & focused on the sexual act being performed at the moment
  3. Stress caused by something totally different is creating anxiety for him & with it being such an intimate situation, the performer starts to feel that change in energy between them, starts to worry it’s because they aren’t doing something right– so on, so on, and so forth…
  4. Last but not least, the harsh reality is…maybe the attraction just isn’t quite where he needs it be in order to experience orgasms in a shorter amount of time

I get THIS frustrated about it too...OMG it’s so real...

Now, as you can imagine – the first option is definitely not something we can control. Our bodies do the total opposite of what we want them to do with basic everyday shit – like when we find ourselves standing in the middle of a room, totally forgetting why we walked in that bitch in the first place. #TheStruggles



The second and third options (depending on why the stress and/or block is happening) are capable of adjustment, BUT can also be a little complicated at times. Unfortunately, societal norms & that AWESOME male ego makes it a STRUGGLE for men to acknowledge their “Manhood” could be effected by those crazy things only women experience. Ya know, emotions

As a side note: This is the only face I know how to make when that misogynistic shit comes up with men....like really tho?! Y’all don’t have ANY emotions?! Really? wtf ever...but let me get back on track....lol

 With the fourth and final option, the only way to know if lack of attraction is or interest is really an issue is by asking him straight up how he feels. There’s not better source for that information than him! Let me be very clear though -- I can’t be held responsible for the amount of honesty his answer really has now! LOL I’m just kidding boo ;)  

One thing I know for sure is that over analyzing his behavior & paying attention to the tone in every word he says, to try figuring out his interest level, will only drive BOTH of you insane. I know from experience, after experience, after experience like most of us who find ourselves in that space more than we like to admit. 

So, I hope some of this helps! If you end up eliminating all 4 possibilities – hit me up again & I’ll give ya some more til we figure this thaaang out! 

Always remember, your sexy is safe with me! ;)  Until next time….

- ♥ e.